He asks me ‘What’s new? ‘
And suprisingly ,
I have nothing to say

Except, maybe
” I don’t think we should be together anymore. I don’t feel the same about you, at all. In fact, i may not even love you. You’re not, who i thought you were, and who i thought i loved. So can you save me frustration and can we break up?”

But instead i find myself saying
It’s really hot outside
I had a slight cold but it’s better.
I’m content with the way things are.

” Do you want to talk me at all Emmanuelle?”
And again, i want to say
“I got used to living without you, endless phone calls and dreaming about you.But I guess I was in love with the idea of you.I can’t fight anymore for you
..And i don’t know if i want us to be together.It just doesn’t feel right inside, God knows I’ve tried”

But instead i say
“no, i mean yes, i’m sorry i’m in and out of it, i guess i had too much Dayquil. Call me later?”

Yes, he is the same as he usually is,
His way, or the highway.

And i’ve never been this glad to hit the end button. I sit back against my lavishly made bed and think;

It’s those thoughts, the kind that makes you want to rip your hair out one by one, who stops the blood flow to your head, make you gritt your teeths, give you a headache and make you snappy. I’m tired of the charades. Hate is a strong word, but i hate everything about him now. He pops his collar, he’s got no class, his rap music is overly flamboyant…it’s just plain annoyance. I’m Irate. No one ever warned me that a heartbreak that opens your eyes is the kind that hurts the most…Maybe, just maybe, if this whole play could stop, he’d go back to that girl who was sitting on his lap, the one he wanted to go back home with but never did, because he was too drunk. Maybe it would save me all the trouble.

Tears,-i’ve used up a tankful.
I get on with my life. He gets on with his.
After a while, that diamond ring becomes an annoyance
i stop wearing it.
And he no longer calls, simply texts.
And even there, it’s all cutt and dry on my part.

I know this is all very boring.

There was drama enough in my turbulent past:
If nothing much happens, I’m thankful.
Mr Macho man leaves me
And frankly i couldnt care less
I go on about my day.

I’m taking the next day to recover.
Have a safe morning.
It’s all really annoying.

Now, i know everything i aspire to.
And he’s not a part of it.
I’m painting it all, the colors i want

And i’m glad i’ve pressed the end button.